Jim and I Celebrate 40 Years of Marriage

May 9, 2021May 9, 2021

Jim and I Celebrate 40 Years of Marriage

I remember the day like it was yesterday. It was May 10, 1980 and I was at the VIP in Baden. Having just arrived, I turned down an offer to dance with my girlfriends and instead decided to sit down for a few minutes. I was wearing light green Calvin Klein jeans and a silky top.

In those days, I was selling cars at my dad’s Nissan dealership. I drove a 280Z to the VIP that night. But I’d worked all day and I’m sure I was just relaxing until the desire to dance kicked in.

At this same moment, my future husband saw me from across the room, sitting by myself at an otherwise empty table full of drink glasses. He later said, “I could have heard a pin drop.”

He came to the table and asked if we could talk. I told him to “keep walking.” I watched him circle the big room and come back to me again. This time, my Greek instinct for hospitality kicked in and I told him to sit down.

We spent the whole evening together. He wasn’t a dancer but we talked and played pin ball together (I love pin ball). He said he’d walk me to my car and on the way out, he picked up his fedora to go with the minty green leisure suit he was wearing.

As I arrived at my car, he asked if I’d like to do something fun. I said ok and gave him my work phone number. He called me every day for a month and I consistently gave him excuses why I couldn’t go out.

Finally he told me he was going to stop calling me if we didn’t get together. I agreed and we had a fabulous time. We went to Kennywood and a nice Italian restaurant called Pompeo’s. Six months later we were engaged. One year later, to the day, we were married.

Our rehearsal dinner was at my parent’s house, complete with a roast lamb on a spit. My mom and my aunts went over the top with all their Greek specialties- pastichio, stuffed grape leaves, and homemade pastries. My dad manned the bar with shots of ouzo for all.

The day we were married, May 10, 1981, was a Sunday and it was Mother’s Day. I remember my Greek Orthodox priest, Father Kiramarios, saying it was a day to honor all women. We had a big Greek wedding with lots of friends, a big cake from Keystone Bakery, and a three piece bouzouki band. The Barlamas family catered and everyone had a huge baked chicken dinner. My godparents and their family came from Charleston, SC. It was a day to remember.

Photography by Dan McConnell. Loved that beautiful cake by Keystone Bakery!

Six months later I was pregnant with my daughter, Michelene, and four years later my son John was born. Now we have two beautiful grandchildren, Gavin and Penelope Katherine.

The marriage ceremony in the Greek Orthodox church is especially beautiful. To Jim and I, marriage is sacred- a vow between two people, in front of God, to love and cherish each other. It is not to be taken lightly. In my career choice as a wedding planner, I always try to keep this in mind when I am helping my couples.

To have been married on Mother’s Day is a great blessing. When the time comes around each year, it is as though I am doubly blessed to have both so close together. My feeling about marriage is this- love one another, work things out, don’t give up, and seek help when you need it, whether from clergy or otherwise. Keep God in your life so you have a heavenly perspective on things.

Please bless us with your prayers for many more years together.

Love,

Joanne

June 16, 2019June 16, 2019

The Things My Father Taught Me

He demonstrated an entrepreneurial spirit that is with me today.

Today is Father’s Day and twenty two years ago I received an early morning call from my mother. She said that my father had passed in his sleep, at home, just the way he had always hoped he would.

I dressed quickly and left almost immediately. I didn’t speed; actually I took my time and thought about my dad. He had not been himself the last few years of his life. Congestive heart had robbed him of his energy but true to form, he lived a year past the time the doctor had predicted he would.

I grew up in a strict household. Dad did not allow me to date at a young age, be out late, wear provocative clothes or eye make up. It took me a long time to realize the things he restricted me from and how they have formed my character today. Rather than being resentful, I choose to view these things as blessings and am thankful for them.

Dad was a dynamic motivator. He was on the church building committee and stood strong about our need for a new worship space. At our centennial celebration a few years ago, the evening’s chair, Mr. P, told a story of how he and others went into the dirt foundation of the church (the only part that was started), sat on cement blocks, and listened how my father told them (under the glow of flashlights) that they needed to keep their enthusiasm up. This is an example of what an amazing team leader Dad was.

Owning his own business for years, Dad gave me a job when I really needed one. In the process, he demonstrated an entrepreneurial spirit that I carry within me today. Through good and bad times, he kept his business going and believe me, there were some tough times. He kept learning all of his life and was willing to adjust, try the new, discard the old, and be with the times.

Honest to the core, he frequently resisted the temptation to twist, fib, or lie. He was very honest and at times it was to his disadvantage. However, his moral compass was firmly intact and he upheld a disposition of character and integrity. I hope that I even come close to this.

The older I get, the more I appreciate my Dad and the lessons he taught me. I’m sure, just like me, he had moments of indecision, defeat, and surrender. Yet he persisted. He continued on with his business, life, and his great love of God. Into heaven above, I thank him for all that he taught and gave me towards the life I have today.

Dad and Bishop Maximos. Dad is the Godfather of our church.

Proverbs 22:6: Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

March 13, 2019March 13, 2019

Take a Vacation

*My mom and the three of us, Me (L), Mary (Front), Cally (Right)*

It is early in the morning as I am writing this. The view from my window is amazing. White sand, bright blue lifeguard stand, and people already walking on the beach. I am into the second week of a two week vacation, here with my family in beautiful Siesta Key, Florida.

I am 61 years young and this is only the second time in my life that I can remember having a two week vacation. The first was a trip to Greece, 11 years ago. I never thought it would be this long that I haven’t returned. I hope Greece is next on the list of two week vacations.

What does it feel like to take two weeks off? First, it feels self indulgent and I’m definitely not used to that. Then there’s a bit of guilt. My husband isn’t here, my sister in law is feeding the dog and watering my plants, and I miss my family. But, at the same time, there are twenty family members here, coming and going at any given time, and the closeness and comfort of that is simply grounding.

When I turned 50, I wondered how I would get through the next decade of work and responsibilities. I was burned out, tired of pushing myself and yet, there was more pushing to do. I survived it and now I am fast approaching the time that I hope to do more of this.

If you’ve never had a two week vacation, I encourage you to do so. I bet you have the PTO (Paid Time Off) but you procrastinate it away. You tell yourself things like, “I’m so busy, I can’t take that much time” or “I don’t have the funds”, but I bet you could figure it out if you gave yourself permission. There are lots of ways to find a time and place to relax. You have to tell yourself that you’re really worth it.

Isn’t it all about that in the end? We can’t allow ourselves the judgment of what others will think, or say, when we announce that we’re leaving. Or we think what would I do with all that time? I’m one of those that have a hard time not having a list of things to do. But the health benefits of vacation time – both physical and mental- make it imperative that we do this for ourselves from time to time.

I wrote a post a while ago about taking a vacation and I think some of my readers scheduled one afterwards. Here’s hoping that this post inspires you to take the time to schedule that PTO (that you’re going to lose if you don’t use it). If you need a travel companion, give me a call.

PS. Even one week is beneficial. If you can’t do two weeks, at least go for one.

Celebrating my mother’s upcoming 90th birthday, together.

September 1, 2018

Beach Mornings

I have been in the most beautiful seaside town for the past week- Emerald Isle, North Carolina. It is through the graciousness and benevolence of friends that I am here.

It had been a few years since I spent time with the Atlantic Ocean. Though I went to Nantucket a couple of years ago, it was too cold to wade in. When I go to Siesta Key (Florida) in March, I’m on the gulf side.

Having been raised on vacations in Ocean City, Maryland, the Atlantic Ocean is like an old friend. The sound of the waves and salty air are familiar. When I stick my toes in the warm sand, it’s as if I’ve come home.

On this vacation, I left my family behind. It’s a relatively new experience for me. There’s no one to take care of here (really) other than myself. I’m aware of trying to be a help- making breakfast, setting up a pot of coffee, loading and unloading the dishwasher, etc- but it is not mandatory. I’ve chosen not to go out to dinner a few times, embracing the peace and quiet that’s left behind.

Dare we (who are so busy) strip away our responsibilities on purpose? Who are we when we are not mothering, working, worrying, anticipating, or stressing? We are wrapped around our identities like the wrapper on a lollipop. It’s a challenge to strip that away, let ourselves relax, and enjoy the nothingness of vacation.

Getting up at the crack of dawn to see the sun rise is challenging. Yes, when we set no alarm clock the temptation to sleep in is oh, so strong. I did get up early several times, mainly because I normally do; I’m a rooster who likes to be up with the sun. One morning, I sat on the deck with my coffee, eagerly awaiting the dawn. As the first rays began to appear, I couldn’t resist the tug to get down on the beach. The first time, I was dressed in only pajama shorts (with watermelons on them no less) and a Bette Midler t-shirt. I said to my friend John, “No one will care how I look.”

It was profoundly quiet except for the sound of the waves. As I watched the sun come up, a feeling of being one with God came over me. No one and nothing else, in those few moments, mattered. It was just me and my creator. I wasn’t afraid. I was silenced and humbled by the simple magnificence of what I was witnessing.

I started walking and met a 5 month old yellow lab and his mom. DJ was very interested in me and let me pet the top of his head. A man with a tripod and camera was setting up a shot with a conch shell and a starfish. I thought, “Buddy, you are missing the point.” The sunrise was so gorgeous and I hope he took the time to notice it.

I probably have fifty sunrise and sunset pictures at this point. Laughing, I tried to eliminate a few but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Each one is slightly different. I love them all.

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Have you made your getaway plans yet? I hope you do!

Love from the beach,

Joanne xo

June 10, 2018June 10, 2018

Happy 65th Anniversary Mom and Dad!

I happened to ask my mom the other day, If Dad was still around, what anniversary would you be celebrating this year? Mom replied that she and my dad were married in 1953 so on June 21st, they would be celebrating 65 years of marriage.

Over the years, I’ve heard many stories from my mother about their courtship. Mom spied Dad for the first time at Jeannie Drizos’ wedding around 1951. She lost track of him for a little bit but they reconnected in 1952. Shortly after, my dad gave her an engagement ring.

When I interviewed Mom for this post, here’s what she told me about her wedding. They were married at St. Spyridon Greek Orthodox Church in Monessen, PA. Their reception was also in Monessen, at the Sokol Hall, and they had a live band. The Manis Brothers were an all mandolin band. I would have loved to have heard that! My Uncle Bil Gameos was living in New York City at the time and mom said she remembers that he performed a live dance number for them.

Mom said her gown was modeled after Queen Elizabeth’s wedding dress. A few years ago, my daughter Michelene, modeled it at an event in Sewickley, PA. It is still a stunning gown to this day. The bridesmaid’s dresses, which are also WOW!, were bought at Kaufmann’s downtown, as was my mother’s gown.

My mom said they went to Cuba for their honeymoon!

My mom has two very old, very beautiful albums. The pictures are still heavily glued in place. This is why you will see the pages of the albums (below) and not scanned pictures.

My dad passed away 21 years ago this month. It was Father’s Day and Pentecost. He is sorely missed. I thought it would be a wonderful tribute to both of my parents to write this blog and share some of their pictures.

Enjoy this walk back in time! Please write any comments for my mom (now 89 years young) here on this blog, or on my Facebook post. I will be sure and share them with her.

xo Joanne

May 20, 2018

Yanni’s 25th Anniversary Concert

Twenty five years ago, I was 35 years old. My daughter Michelene was 11. I don’t remember who started it, but my sister Cally, mom, and I became huge fans of the CD, Yanni at the Acropolis.

Now I’m sure you know that Yanni is Greek. And we are Greek. We Greeks really stick together. When we heard that Yanni was coming to the pavilion in Burgettstown 25 years ago, we went. Michelene was not a huge fan. I remember her asking me why he kept flipping his long hair during the concert.

Fast forward to 2018. I’m on the internet and something leads me to the Cultural Trust’s website. I get there and suddenly I see the 25th anniversary concert of Yanni at the Acropolis! I can hardly contain myself. I look up seats and they are affordable and available still.

I began to rack my brain, trying to think who would go with me (I was ready to go by myself but having a friend along is more fun). I settled on my cousin, Gary, and so I sent him a text. I casually asked him, “Are you a fan of Yanni at the Acropolis by chance?”

He sends me a text back, “Yes! I just listened to that music this morning!”

Long story short, my cousin was game to go with me. We decided on dinner beforehand, the whole nine yards of a memorable evening. Central Diner in Robinson was my choice of course, because, well, it’s owned by Greeks!

This past Wednesday evening, Gary picked me up in a shiny blue Chevy Camaro. He was streaming 80’s music and Yanni, and we caught up as only cousins can. At Central Diner, we went classic- cheeseburgers and french fries.

We headed downtown and parked in Theatre Parking. Lots of people were out and about. Being early for the show, we hung out in the outer lobby and waited. We ended up bumping into several more people I knew from my church.

The concert started on time. The back up musicians came on and tuned up a bit. Then, he emerged…..Yanni. He was dressed mostly in white. His hair was a bit shorter than 25 years ago. But his smile was still the same.

For the next three hours (no intermission!), Yanni played many of his famous compositions. Over and over, he went back and forth from his piano to his extra keyboards. He seemed tireless. His microphone was on his piano and he frequently stopped to talk to us. I don’t remember him talking as much years ago.

One thing that impressed me was his way of giving all of his back up musicians their time in the spotlight. The two violinists and drummer were exceptional. The extra keyboardist was nothing short of amazing. Congo drums, trumpet, cello, and bass. You could tell he revered his musicians and I loved how it was not all about him.

Yanni remains one of my absolute favorite performers of all time. I’d put him up there with Bette Midler and Bruce Springsteen (who I saw at The Stanley when I was in my early twenties). He smiled constantly, engaged with the audience, and talked about his family.

He played a song named for his mother. Felitsa was absolutely beautiful. Here’s a version I found, taped two years ago in Egypt. This will give you the closest feel for how magical and intimate his Pittsburgh concert was.

One of my favorite songs of Yanni’s is Until the Last Moment. Yanni told us about his father’s words. He said something like this, “My father would say, the past is gone, the future is tomorrow. What we have is today and we should enjoy every moment, until the last moment.” Truer words were never spoken.

What did I think of the concert? I called it “Soul Touching”. The music touched me deep in my heart and soul. It lifted me up and made me forget everything for three solid hours.

I’m so glad I got to go to this concert! Anyone want to go to Cincinnati, Ohio on July 27? 🙂

Click HERE to see Yanni’s tour dates.

Thank you to my friend Paula Y. for the photography.

“On the plane home I remember thinking that I am who I am because I have faith in myself, and it has always been the possibility of emotionally rewarding the experiences that has encouraged me to gamble on myself; those experiences have made all that I do worthwhile.” Yanni

May 10, 2018

Happy Anniversary Jim!

It’s hard to believe but 37 years ago today, Jim and I tied the knot. It was a Sunday, Mother’s Day 1981, and I remember so many wonderful and interesting things about that day.

My grandmother and grandfather were at my house. While we were all getting ready, it began to rain heavily. Since we hadn’t left yet, this was somewhat distressing. My yiayia said, “It is good luck to have rain on your wedding day.” I felt better when she said that. Thankfully, the sun came out later during the reception.

For some reason, I drove my sisters and myself to church in a new Nissan 200SX. It was a manual transmission so I’m wondering if they couldn’t yet drive a stick. And yes, it was still pouring rain when we arrived at the church.

Driving to Church. Remember those Kleenex flowers?

My dad. Boy, do I miss him. (I bet that’s my cousin Nick on the left.)

Sometimes you find out things after your wedding that you didn’t even know went on. I found out that one of the groomsmen was dizzy up on the altar and the others didn’t know if he was going to faint or not.

Here we are! All Photography by Dan McConnell.

One of my girlfriends was dating someone at the wedding and I think they had a bit of a disagreement there. Another guest was with her fiance and professed undying love to someone else during the course of the evening. What drama!

Our reception was in the church hall and the Barlamas Family (Franzee’s) made a fantastic meal. Everyone had a half chicken on their plate; it was so generous. I don’t remember having a cookie table but I do remember a delicious white almond cake by Keystone Bakery in Monessen. My mom and the owners were childhood friends.

Our favors were very traditional. We had wrapped white Jordan almonds in white netting. In the Greek culture this is called Bomboniere. I still love Jordan almonds in white netting to this day, don’t you?

Our guests came from Chicago, South Carolina, Monessen, and of course, Ambridge, Pennsylvania. Father John Kiramarios was our priest at that time. I hope I get to see him someday again.

The Gatgounis Family from Charleston, SC. My godfather and godmother.

I think my mom planned my whole wedding. Back in the days, that is how it was done. I picked out my own dress (the first one I tried on), and I think I went with my bridesmaids to pick out their dresses. Other than that, I bet my mom took care of everything.

Today, I’m a wedding coordinator. I’m assisting at a wedding this weekend and next. It is amazing to be here, 37 years later, helping other couples enjoy their day. I am one lucky gal.

Happy Anniversary Jim! Thank you for 37 wonderful years. Two beautiful children and two amazing grandchildren later, here we are. I love you and pray we have many more years together. Love, Jo

January 28, 2018

An Attitude of Gratitude

January 2018 has given us a gamut of things already, hasn’t it? Zero to sixty degrees within the range of a week or two, a flu epidemic, and all kinds of flooding and wild weather. It seems as though we are into the new year with quite a bang.

In the midst of all that, I managed to write three chapters of my next book. (yay!) I’ve had a lingering sinus cold but I loved my usual time with Penny and my mom. I try to practice good self-care (something I’m not always great at), like getting enough rest and drinking plenty of herbal tea with Jim’s delicious honey.

Penny turned two years old this past week. I keep looking at her and thinking Where has the time gone? It seems like only yesterday I was trekking to Pittsburgh to meet her for the first time. Today she’s a bright, active, social, loving child.

Lately, I have been thanking God all day long and especially when I am in one certain place. When I get into bed at night, with my warm flannel sheets, homemade quilt, and fluffy pillows, an overwhelming feeling of gratitude comes over me. I know how blessed and fortunate I am. There are times when I think of my grandparents. They came over on the boat from Greece, in the 1920’s through Ellis Island, with the thoughts of making a better life for themselves.

Two generations later and we have that better life. My grandparents lived on very little and used the teachings and traditions that had been handed down to them. It was reflected in the food they prepared, the gardens they planted, and the hospitality in the little store that my grandparents owned. Neither of my grandparents spoke English when they came here. My own mother had to learn English to go to school. Greek was her primary language and she still speaks it fluently.

Me in my yiayia’s store when I was a little girl.

How often do we stop and think about the things we have? If we are blessed to have good jobs, food on our tables, a warm house, and money to pay our bills, that is something many do not have. If we donate to charities or volunteer for them, that is a way of showing gratitude. To be involved in something wonderful, outside of ourselves, is a precious way to give thanks.

I hope you take the time today (and every day) to be thankful.

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift. 2 Corinthians 9:15

November 19, 2017

A Letter to My Grandson

Yesterday I was going through some office papers when I stumbled across a note that Jim wrote to Gavin last year. I was supposed to post it to my blog but somehow I completely forgot. (please forgive me Jim)

While Jim and I were on vacation last year, Gavin assumed most of the care of our home, including our 13 year old dog Jordan. During a shopping experience at the Nantucket whaling museum store, Jim picked a beautiful compass for Gavin as a gift. He gave it to him when we arrived home.

Without further ado, here is the letter Jim wrote to Gavin.

Compass: A tool often used to help with direction.

Dear Gavin,

While proving yourself this past week by taking care of the house, chickens, and the dog, I was thinking of myself when I was your age. I don’t think I would have done as good a job as you did. Most likely, I would have declined direction or refused the instructions offered to me, thinking that I knew better. Most of the time in my life, when I found myself lost, it was because I declined to use the tools and direction that were so freely given to me.

My hope is that if you use this compass to know the direction you’re starting in, you will always be able to find your way home. But please remember that it works best if you know where you are starting from.

Hopefully, with some Good Orderly Direction, you will never get lost. Always know that I love you. Jim

PS. Clean up your room, stand up straight, and listen to you mom (lol)

When I found this yesterday it melted my heart. Gavin is going to be 17 this coming April. Hard to believe. It feels like yesterday that he was just a little guy.

Thank you Jim for helping me clean out my office and for writing this beautiful letter.

November 12, 2017April 11, 2018

Rock My World

My daughter Michelene and her rock. “There is a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in.”

UPDATE! We will be installing our Kindness Rocks Garden on April 28 at 10am at The Rainbows End Playground, Findlay Township, PA. Come out and share in the dedication with us!!

You might remember that this past June I happened to be at Susquehanna University. It was there that I stumbled upon a Kindness Rocks Garden and stopped in my tracks. It captured my attention and so much so that I contacted my daughter’s childhood friend, Steph, who worked for the Recreation Department of Findlay Township.

I told Steph about the Kindness Rocks Garden and asked if there was a chance that we could make one in Clinton Park. “Sure!”, she said. And that was the beginning.

Since I am turning 60 this month, I wanted to do something to honor my friends and community. Creating this project filled the bill. On Thursday, November 9, about twenty new and old friends gathered to paint rocks and write inspirational sayings on them.

Armstrong Telephone gave us a grant and through them, we were able to buy all of the supplies. The Kindness Rocks website has a pdf form that makes it so easy to get everything you need. The oil based markers were terrific. We also had pre-painted about 25 rocks, just to get the evening started.

My deepest thanks to Steph, Findlay Township, and everyone who turned out! We will be creating the actual garden in Clinton Park this coming Spring of 2018. I promise to keep you posted here and on social media. If you live in the area and would like to make rocks for this project, feel free! We would welcome groups or individuals who love to create. Feel free to contact Findlay Recreation at 724-695-0500 extension 240.

Here’s what a fabulous evening it was.