Greek Families – Joanne Jamis Cain

June 16, 2019June 16, 2019

The Things My Father Taught Me

He demonstrated an entrepreneurial spirit that is with me today.

Today is Father’s Day and twenty two years ago I received an early morning call from my mother. She said that my father had passed in his sleep, at home, just the way he had always hoped he would.

I dressed quickly and left almost immediately. I didn’t speed; actually I took my time and thought about my dad. He had not been himself the last few years of his life. Congestive heart had robbed him of his energy but true to form, he lived a year past the time the doctor had predicted he would.

I grew up in a strict household. Dad did not allow me to date at a young age, be out late, wear provocative clothes or eye make up. It took me a long time to realize the things he restricted me from and how they have formed my character today. Rather than being resentful, I choose to view these things as blessings and am thankful for them.

Dad was a dynamic motivator. He was on the church building committee and stood strong about our need for a new worship space. At our centennial celebration a few years ago, the evening’s chair, Mr. P, told a story of how he and others went into the dirt foundation of the church (the only part that was started), sat on cement blocks, and listened how my father told them (under the glow of flashlights) that they needed to keep their enthusiasm up. This is an example of what an amazing team leader Dad was.

Owning his own business for years, Dad gave me a job when I really needed one. In the process, he demonstrated an entrepreneurial spirit that I carry within me today. Through good and bad times, he kept his business going and believe me, there were some tough times. He kept learning all of his life and was willing to adjust, try the new, discard the old, and be with the times.

Honest to the core, he frequently resisted the temptation to twist, fib, or lie. He was very honest and at times it was to his disadvantage. However, his moral compass was firmly intact and he upheld a disposition of character and integrity. I hope that I even come close to this.

The older I get, the more I appreciate my Dad and the lessons he taught me. I’m sure, just like me, he had moments of indecision, defeat, and surrender. Yet he persisted. He continued on with his business, life, and his great love of God. Into heaven above, I thank him for all that he taught and gave me towards the life I have today.

Dad and Bishop Maximos. Dad is the Godfather of our church.

Proverbs 22:6: Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

March 31, 2019March 31, 2019

Mom’s 90th Birthday in Siesta Key Florida

Mom’s 90th Celebration in Siesta Key. Lots of family!

It was an event a year in the making. When we left Siesta Key in 2018, my mom began talking about her 90th birthday celebration.

For an entire year, we discussed every possible scenario. Should we have appetizers including Greek specialties, such as spanankopita or tiropita? Maybe we should keep it simple and just do cake and champagne? Or should we go all out and make dinner, serving pastichio, salad, and pitas?

The conversations were endless. Mom and I would have them in the car, at her house over coffee, and on the phone. At some point, we settled on champagne and cake. Then a few weeks before we were to leave, there were suddenly more options. Rent the community center, get a bouzouki player, get a caterer. In the end, mom made the final decision.

She wanted to have it in our beautiful condo. We had plenty of room and a screened lanai. My sisters made (from scratch) spanakopita and tiropita. They also did all of the shopping and created small plates of hummus, pita, kalamata olives, and feta cheese. They made a big salad and had two different kinds of pastichio. Cally decorated. Mary hung balloons.

There was debate over a cake. Cally checked with a bakery and a tiered cake was quite pricey. It was decided that we’d get three different Pepperidge Farms cakes. Mom is a huge PF fan. For almost every occasion, birthday or otherwise, mom will get a Pepperidge Farm cake. We decided on white confetti, lemon, and chocolate fudge flavors.

Before the big day, Mary contacted most of our cousins, asking if they’d be in Siesta Key during our stay. As it turned out, there were more than 20 of us there at the same time. It was simply magnificent.

There was laughter, happiness, singing, and eating. The champagne flowed. My cousin Steven created a beautiful book for mom with vintage pictures. Everyone had a wonderful time and we all have many treasured memories.

Near the end of our second week in Siesta Key, we were on the beach and noticed a wedding was being set up behind us. Lo and behold, the ceremony began and afterwards, the whole bridal party walked down the beach right past us! They stood in front of us, posing for the photographer. My sister Mary asked if Ashley (the bride) would take a picture with mom and she obliged! It was another magical moment.

I think we’ll be talking about this vacation for years to come. The memories we made there, the experiences of being together with family, are simply priceless.

Here’s the photography from the party and the wedding!

Getting ready for the party! What would we do without Aunt KC?

The Stunning Flowers (from Trader Joe’s!)

May 11, 2014May 10, 2020

I Got Married on Mother’s Day!

In honor of our 39th wedding anniversary, I’ve updated this post a bit but it is still largely the same as when I wrote it six years ago. All photos by Dan McConnell.

My maternal grandparents came from Stockdale, Pennsylvania. My godparents had arrived from Charleston, South Carolina.

The night before our wedding, my father and uncles roasted a lamb, Greek-style, on a spit in the back yard. My mom, aunts, and grandparents prepared spanakopita, stuffed grape leaves, Greek salad with feta cheese and a host of other yummy dishes, and of course Greek cookies like finikia, baklava and diples. There was Greek music and line dancing in our big basement. The Greeks really know how to get ready for a wedding. There was lots of merriment, dancing, eating, and drinking!

I remember when I told my first boss, Bob at Heritage Floral, that I wanted to get married on Mother’s Day, May 10, 1981. He almost had a melt down! I forgot it was the biggest floral day of the year! Bob finally calmed down when I told him I wanted white silk roses in my bouquet and my bridesmaids’. Silk flowers were the big thing back then. There were real flowers on the reception tables of course and Bob did a spectacular job. Having silk flowers made it easier for Bob to do the bouquets ahead of time, a great time saver in this case!

My wedding was fabulous. Have you ever been to a Greek Orthodox wedding? It is very beautiful and symbolic. My favorite part is the exchanging of the crowns, or Stefana, which symbolizes the unity of the couple and presence of Christ who blesses and joins the couple. The Stefana are exchanged three times, back and forth, by the godparent and this symbolizes a sealing of the union. I still have my crowns to this day and actually had them framed; they are real beauties.

The reception was downstairs in our church hall. The Barlamas family catered the dinner and I swear, everyone had a half chicken on their plate! Greek dancing began shortly after and during the first dance, my father showered us with dollar bills for good luck. My little cousins (who I thought would keep the money!) swept up all the change and bills and that is what we honestly used for spending money while on our honeymoon at Peak N’Peek resort.

The reason I wanted to get married on Mother’s Day was because it was exactly one year to the day that I met Jim. When I asked my priest, Father John, if it was ok to be married on Mother’s Day, he said yes. At our ceremony, I remember him saying it was a day to honor all women and a perfect day to be married.

By the following year on my first anniversary, I was pregnant with my daughter Michelene. She was born on August 7, 1982. My son John came a few years later on January 9, 1986.

The significance of Mother’s Day as a wedding day has never been lost on me. I love being a mother to two beautiful children and a grandmother to Gavin and Penny. I have been blessed with a great husband who has been willing to do the hard work of staying together. It has not always been easy but we have persisted through the good, and challenging, times.

I believe the secret to a long relationship is respect for your partner. And a dedication to love and cherish the other person, no matter what. Being a mom is just the bonus to a good marriage.