Category: Grace

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Life in the Fast Lane

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. Mae West

Boy, it has been a hectic couple of months….

Superwoman
(Photo credit: Gallivanting Gai)

I don’t know how I get myself into it (well, yes I do!), but every now and then I have a schedule that is just a complete whirlwind. I run from one thing to another, changing clothes like a magician, grateful that I don’t have too stressful a job or I’d never be able to keep up with my own social life.

Why do I do this? I’ll tell you. I don’t want to miss one exciting moment. I want to say YES to it all; the action, the fun, and sometimes, yes, the responsibility.

A blogger friend of mine wrote a post last week and I swear she was reading my mind. Her post was called “ENOUGH”. It was perfect. I needed to read it; to remember to slow down, to savor the moments of joy and gratitude in my life. I was finding myself rushing, rushing, rushing. One day I thought, what the heck is the big hurry?

Lately, in addition to or in spite of my full schedule, I have been pondering some big questions. Asking myself, is my life ok, is it meaningful, am I killing myself softly with all this craziness, do I need a change from M&M’s to peppermint patties?

Just kidding…..(but I do love peppermint patties!)

What inspired the pondering is a book I’m reading.  Anna Quindlen’s latest bestseller “Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake” is the first AQ book I’ve ever read. I love her already. She pulls out her gutsiest thoughts and plunks them down on paper, writes in amazing honesty, and makes some darn good observations.

So good in fact that she is inspiring me to do some deep thinking. I am reflecting on lots of interesting stuff. My life, my quirky habits and what makes me tick. Here’s a few revelations I just have to share.

I am at my best when I am creating. Taking bits and pieces and pulling them together and making something wonderful out of it all. It doesn’t matter if it’s an amazing event, a new business, chicken soup or a craft project, I am best left without directions and no hot glue gun.

And, I like to teach and to lead. I like to inspire, motivate and cause a change. Positive change that is. Lead from the front after all.

My mother (Katherine) was a serious homemaker, the best really at cooking, cleaning, entertaining and organizing. My father (Mike) was pure salesman, through and through, and he loved to lead, direct, manage and inspire. Perhaps I am a combination of both of them, their (I hope) finest qualities, including the attraction to sweets my mother has evidently passed onto me.

What does this latest revelation tell me? Maybe I have my hand in the pot of each one of my parents. My mother handled her own schedule and commitments, and my dad handled his separately. I wonder if my life is pulled from both of theirs? Magic homemaker (wannabe) on the one hand, project manager on the other. I wonder how many of you reading this are combinations of your mom and dad (or primary caretakers), burning the candle at both ends?

No wonder we are a tired lot. This world is so fast, so busy, so full of stuff to DO. How do I keep it in perspective? First, I count my blessings. I have a full life; family, friends, children, grandchild, amazing partner in Mr. Cain. Second, I can’t stand to be bored. So, when too many activities start to fill my plate to the brim, I knock a few off and slow down just a bit.

Thank goodness it’s the perfect weather for kicking back. I made a big pot of chicken soup last night (no recipe!) and I can’t wait to have a big bowlful of it.

How do you slow down? (or speed up?) How full do you like your plate? Do you ever realize (and give yourself credit) for your strong points? I know…so many questions! Just pick one and tell me your deepest thoughts!

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Fall Into FOCUS

The Giving Tree

I had the privilege of chairing an event last week that surpassed all of my expectations. It was a beautiful event, one really worthy of mention.

It was a fundraiser for a mission center in one of Pittsburgh’s poorest neighborhoods, The Hill District. The FOCUS Pittsburgh center opened only fifteen short months ago and already it is transforming lives.

The guests who attended the evening were special, the doctors and directors who spoke held us spellbound. The donors who gave unselfishly were inspirational. My committee was amazing in their dedication to the planning and execution of the event.

Guests plucked leaves off The Giving Tree and donated activities for kids, snacks for backpacks, and medical supplies for the future clinic.  The silent auction tantalized us with jewelry, gift certificates and beautiful pictures. Everyone walked around with big smiles, happy to make new friends and greet old ones. And of course, there was some delicious food to munch on and enjoy too.

But the real show stealer that night were the people who have been positively impacted by the mission center. I don’t remember exactly how many came, maybe seven or eight. Plus a young child who stole my heart; I couldn’t resist hugging and kissing him, just for good measure.

When Paul, the director of the Pittsburgh FOCUS center, introduced the mission center friends, the little boy’s mother was the first to speak. He held his mother’s hand while she told of her life before she discovered the center. The young mother was clearly pregnant and said she had contemplated abortion. When she found the center the people there embraced her and offered assistance. She kept thanking the center over and over. It was a profound experience for us all to be there and hear her story, their stories. It was an evening I will never forget.

Before I close, I have to tell you my absolute favorite part of the evening. It actually occurred before the event started. Paul was sitting with the guests from the center and suddenly he announced to them that I was the main reason the event was even happening. Those incredible friends jumped up, starting yelling “Thank you!!” and engulfed me in a giant hug, the likes of which I have never experienced. I said then, and I still say now, that was worth every moment of planning.

I believe we are all on a Mission of Grace and Love. We are here to make a difference, help others, and….to love one another.

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Follow the Breadcrumbs…

Bread
Bread (Photo credit: Moyan_Brenn)

I have been thinking lately about bread. Really good bread.

I love a good crusty baguette, a fresh loaf of Italian, or even a good olive oil bread. Lately with the multitude of great breads out there, it’s hard to make a decision which one to choose. I do love a darker loaf with little bits of greek kalamata olives in it. Yum….

Bread, for me, is one of the sustainers of life. A good loaf of bread, some orange marmalade and a hunk of great cheese is all I really need.

I happened to think of bread one day in terms of The Path. My Life Path that is. I wish I could see ahead, wish I would know what’s in store for me, but of course I can’t. I have no idea what’s around the next bend because though God has a great plan for me, I (of course) am not on the planning committee.

So I am left to follow the breadcrumbs. Yes, those graceful breadcrumbs that are just outside my door, waiting to be picked up. I will devour them (because I love bread) and likely, I will keep following them, keep picking them up, and keep having faith. I know wherever I go, those breadcrumbs will be there, showing me the way.

That chance meeting with a friend (or stranger), a random phone call, a wrong turn that ends up being right are part of The Path. It’s about saying YES. Yes to change, to growth, to ME. A chance for me to step up and many times, to find a happier, less fretful way. If I am paying attention, those breadcrumbs will show me the way.

The best thing I can do is to keep picking them up, keep going forward. And, I’ll take the time to really enjoy those breadcrumbs…..

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Beautifully Imperfect

Last weekend, a bunch of friends and I (and Jim of course) went up to Cook Forest, PA. and rented a cabin in the middle of the forest. We’ve been to “Cook” many times but it never fails….the forest can clear my head and lower my stress level just by its very existence.

When we drove up the driveway to our cabin, I noticed a large tree at the edge of the property. It was spectacular. Tall and gorgeous, just like the other trees around it, only slightly different. Near the bottom of it, close to the ground, was a huge round mass of extra tree, a nature-ish wort, out there, like an elbow of sorts, for everyone to see.

So I spent some of the weekend thinking about imperfection. I thought of the times, in my younger days, when I had focused on what I thought was wrong with me instead of right. How I would wish for long, blond hair instead of the curly black hair I was given. How I wished I was less busty, slightly taller, and had less of a grecian nose. Looking back on it, maybe it was a by product of youth, to want what I did not have, or maybe it was a teeny self esteem issue, something lots of young girls suffer from in a culture based too much on perfection.

As I age, I realize there is great beauty in imperfection. Just like that tree. It makes us who we are and what we are. We learn to either get over ourselves or suffer eventually, from slight forms of mental anguish or too much botox. Recently, I have been making an effort to love myself fully for who I really am, and too, the person I am growing into. It has taken me years to appreciate my own endowed gifts- the same curly hair I used to try and tame, my slightly larger nose, my graceful legs from all the Greek dancing I did growing up.

When I love myself for who I really am, a beautifully imperfect individual, my unrealistic expectations fall away and I am free to use the gifts I have been given. And, to go forth and make the most of them.

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Anonymous Gifts

Big Heart of Art - 1000 Visual Mashups
Big Heart of Art – 1000 Visual Mashups (Photo credit: qthomasbower)

A few summers ago, Jim and I were driving to our summer vacation destination of Ocean City, Maryland.  We came upon the toll booth to the Bay Bridge in Maryland and as we inched our way up to pay the entry fee, Jim remarked (as he did almost every year) that if he’d have bought an EZ Pass, we wouldn’t have been waiting in a long, slow line.

When we got up to the toll booth, the booth employee said “The car in front of you has paid your toll…Have a nice day…”

I think we were momentarily speechless while we absorbed the fact that someone, who didn’t even know us, had been so generous as to pay for our toll…

Fast forward to a recent occurrence in which, as an event chairperson, I received a very generous check in the mail for an event I am helping to coordinate. When I called the donor to thank him, I asked him how he would like his sponsorship to read on the poster (that would be displayed on an easel as guests walked into the event). He said, “I wish to remain anonymous”.

I thanked him again and we hung up the phone. I felt amazed at the unselfish act I was just witness to.

I am lucky to know people who, day after day, do things out of the goodness of their hearts to “pay it forward”. Some have been given ample financial means and wish to share the fruits of their success with others. Others have been through troublesome times and have emerged, strong and faithful, and mean to help (with a full heart) to pay forward the gifts they have received.

But what about those who do things anonymously? This is another thing entirely in my book. I sense there is something ego-less, unselfish, and spiritually mature about this type of behavior. To do acts of loving kindness and generosity without announcement or fanfare, is truly something special in my eyes.

Though I do not have the means lately to be financially generous, I try to do anonymous acts daily that benefit others in small ways. I believe this to be a crucial part of my spiritual growth and maintenance. And, I really don’t have to spend much (or anything at all!). I can leave extra change as a tip, put money in parking meters, do a kind act for a stranger. No one sees me and I try and resist the urge to puff myself up and go telling on myself.

If I give an anonymous gift, I know what I did….and so does God. And really, that’s everyone who needs to know.

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Reach for the Sky

The sky is the daily bread of the eyes.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

A Beautiful Sky

I am in love with the sky. And though I love a perfectly blue sky, I am even more captivated by a sky that is filled with white clouds and different depths and shades of blue.

God must have certainly had something in mind when he created the Sky. I wonder what he was thinking? Maybe he imagined the perfect backdrop to whatever landscape might be in our line of sight. Think of the perfectness of it behind weddings, picnics, farm houses, and even your house.

Hello Morning Sky!

Sometimes in our work and personal life we will say (when motivated) “Reach for the Sky!”. What does the saying mean to you? To me, it means aim high, achieve your dreams, go for the top….

But maybe, just maybe, it means something more. Perhaps it means stop, take a moment, and use the “powers to be” that are out there in the universe. Could we possibly use  “Reach for the Sky” as a means of channeling the power greater than ourselves for peace and serenity?

Imagine it. Reach for the Sky….for peace of mind…..Reach for the Sky…for answers…..Reach for the Sky….when feeling restless, lonely or troubled…

Perhaps the Sky is a true gift of Grace. Certainly it contains the air we breathe and the weather that gives us rain or shine. But I believe it is more. For me, it has become one of the tools I use to ground myself in times of stress. I will sit outside in quiet, close my eyes, and allow the sun, moon or stars to envelope me and in turn, calm me. The Sky will literally take my cares away and leave behind a feeling of peace and serenity.

I’m going to share a couple more of my favorite Sky photos with you. I hope you become convinced, as I have, there is a great deal more to the Sky than just a pretty backdrop!

Photos by Michelene Cain
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Summer Gratitudes

There shall be eternal summer in the grateful heart.  ~Celia Thaxter

Labor Day is coming up this weekend and I always feel like it is the end cap to the summer. And though the first day of fall is still weeks away, I swear I can see the leaves starting to change before my eyes. I can hardly believe the summer is almost over.

How was your summer? Here in southwest Pennsylvania it was very hot, then very rainy, and now it’s just kind of perfect. The days are shorter (yes, always a bit depressing) and there is a chill at night and first thing in the morning. I don’t mind it necessarily; it is more comfortable with less heat and it’s much easier to sleep at night. Cooler weather is also perfect for little backyard campfires and toasted marshmallows!

Abundant Tomatoes!

I appreciate quite a few things about this summer. The first was the garden. Jim (my husband) and Michelene (my daughter), did a gorgeous job with the garden. We are still reaping tomatoes, eggplant, zucchini, onions, garlic and basil. I never get tired of tomatoes and will eat them sliced and salted as long as the garden will give them to me.

Ariel and Jordan!

My cousins came from New York and brought a few extra persons along. Josh, who is seven, delighted me with the way he hung on his grandpapa (Julio), kissed his cheek so adamantly and hugged him endlessly. Imani came too, a blessing from above, and it was so good to spend some time with her. I am always happy to see Christina, Julio and Ariel. God has really blessed me with a beautiful family.

There were some fun birthday parties tossed into the summer mix; Michelene’s landmark birthday and Cally’s tree house soiree. I made some new friends and embraced relatives I do not always get to see so often. This was one of the best parts of the summer.

Congratulations John!

My son John graduated with a computer science degree and I am really proud of him. I just know he is going to make some great employer very happy!

There were some challenges too and that is always the case, isn’t it? We are getting over a loss and praying for the repair of a relationship. If we know deep in our heart that God loves us unconditionally, it is Grace that will help get us through the bumpy spots. Thank goodness we are not in charge of the universe. All we can do is pray and turn it over.

Last weekend the local township held its annual fair. I didn’t make it to the park in time to join my family, but I saw the ending night fireworks from the comfort of my own front yard. I had Jordan with me and she didn’t mind the noise a bit. As we sat on the lawn, in darkness, my heart was overflowing with love for my full life and gratitude for a summer well lived.

Farewell Summer of 2012!
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Gifts from my Grandmother

Yiayia In Her Busy Kitchen

If God had intended us to follow recipes,
He wouldn’t have given us grandmothers.
~Linda Henley

The older I get, the more I appreciate my grandmother. Though she has been gone a long time, my memories of her lately are stronger than ever. And more and more, I realize the great gifts she gave me that are very much a part of me.

Whenever I cut a good tomato, fresh from the garden, I think of my Yiayia. My grandfather always put in a big garden and by August, there were plenty of fresh vegetables to be had. Yiayia would make summer salads with her beautiful leaf lettuce and lots of those really red tomatoes.

I love having Basil around!

She also loved fresh basil and would frequently cut a small piece to put behind her ear. She’d walk up from her garden, the basil leaves facing front and she’d have a big smile on her face. I think she just loved the smell of it and liked keeping it close to her. These days, I love basil and we frequently grow a couple of big basil plants every summer. Rubbing the leaves between my fingers and smelling the fresh scent is one of my favorite things to do. I don’t remember if Yiayia cooked with her basil (I imagine she did!) but I love to snip up the leaves and put fresh basil on everything from roasted vegetables to green salads.

As with most grandmas, Yiayia was an excellent cook. She made everything from scratch, mixing most ingredients together with her hands. She had a big ceramic ware bowl she would use to make Greek avgolemeno soup. As a young child, she would let me use her hand held rotary beaters and I’d beat those chicken eggs to a frothy yellow. She’d have homemade chicken broth with rice all ready to go, and we’d add my yellowy beaten eggs to the hot broth just a little bit at a time. She’d finish it off with some lemon juice and the result would be a smooth, slightly lemony chicken soup that was just out of this world. I don’t ever remember seeing a recipe written down for it; I’m sure she didn’t need one.

Holidays were a big deal to her. At Christmas and Easter she’d roast a leg of lamb and do all the fancy sides: Greek oregano potatoes sliced longways into quarters and baked in the oven, a big salad with tomatoes and feta cheese, Easter bread with a red hard boiled egg baked right into it, little black eyed peas drizzled with olive oil and lemon. There was always amazing food at her table during the holidays.

I think the most important gift my Yiayia gave me was her example of what hospitality should be. When you had dinner at her house, she pulled out all the stops. The linen tablecloth and napkins came out, her most beautiful serving pieces and china were polished and displayed, candles were lit. I can remember numerous times when the table would be so full with multiple selections of food, we hardly had a place to eat!

It it really those great times, those “eating” times, that make me realize how lucky we really were. To have had her among us, teaching us all those traditional things that to her came so easily….what a gift!

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The Penthouse Suite of My Mind

Isn’t it amazing what we choose to focus on?

The above image arrived on a piece of mail recently and I just had to take a picture of it. I stared at it for a time, had a good chuckle and then spent a few minutes thinking about it.

Here is my take on the image. There is so much that matters to me and much of it I do not have control over. This includes my family, my kids, my job, my volunteer projects, etc. etc. etc. It is impossible to keep my mind and attention on “everything” important to me, therefore I choose what is meaningful for that day or that moment.

My mind likes to work overtime on worry and predicting the future. Yes, I like to think I have a crystal ball in my head but really I do not. Taking the most mundane thought or concern and turning it into a ridiculous mountain is a part time hobby of mine. Thankfully, an article I read once compared the mind to a house with rooms. It said: if our thoughts are overwhelming us, we can get up and move to another room. We don’t have to “live” in the negative room of worry and self defeat.

I thought this was a remarkable concept.

Since then, when I get carried away in a room of negative thinking, I try and remember to get up and move to another room in my Mind House. Though I can still hear noise from the negative room, I only hear it as mumbling or whispering. In my “new” room, the style and decor is plush and comfortable. The sofa is very soft and has lots of pillows. There is a fantastic view of woods, a lake, wildlife and flowers through the window. I call this room the “Penthouse Suite” of my mind.

If you’re thinking this is purely a form of meditation, you are right. But I have to tell you, it works. The Penthouse is often times where I fall asleep at night. I have to put aside my worries about today or thoughts about tomorrow and imagine I am on that plush sofa.

Keeping my mind focused on positive things is a mental exercise I practice everyday. And, I believe it is possible to train my mind to head to the Penthouse when things get a bit hairy. I’d prefer the plush sofa over worry anytime.

What does the opening image mean to you? What do you “focus” on?

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Kayaking on Raccoon Lake

All photos of Raccoon Lake by Michelene Cain

Every now and then I call a “Family Day”. I want my immediate family there: husband Jim (of course), my two adult kids, Michelene and John, John’s girlfriend Toni and my grandson, Gavin. It’s my way of keeping us connected and supportive of each other. We usually discuss ahead of time what we’re thinking of doing and it’s always something fun.

We were going to go to Cook Forest and canoe on the Clarion River but somehow it just didn’t happen. It’s a two hour drive each way and we’ve all been so busy. My brother in law Chuck mentioned recently that he kayaked at Raccoon Lake (a 10 minute ride from our house) and I was seriously interested.

My friend Mary kayaks and I used to see kayakers on the three rivers in Pittsburgh when I drove into Oakland for work. I have always been interested in kayaking but figured I was past my prime for it. Turns out this is not so. My biggest fear was what happens if the kayak tips over? (thinking my legs would be stuck inside of the kayak)…I asked my brother in law this and he said, “You just pop out. “

He also said you have to wear a life vest and upon hearing that, I was really game.

So we headed down to the lake around 6pm after a nice backyard cook-out, and after laying on the sunscreen and bug spray. The lake was positively gorgeous and well, you judge for yourself. We had a wonderful time!

Do you ever have a “Family Day”? What do you like to do when you get together with family?

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