“Let us always long to hear the stories of grace in others’ lives. Every conversion is the story of a blessed defeat.” C.S. Lewis
Years ago, I was in a very important meeting. The executive director was there with several key people. There were six of us sitting around a table. I had just poured myself a nice big cup of coffee with cream. You can guess the rest. Yep, I spilled that coffee all over the table.
I was mortified of course but it was over quickly. We all grabbed napkins and they helped me clean it up. I apologized; I was embarassed, but it only lasted a few minutes. I remember thinking to myself, “I am not perfect. Oh well. Get over it.” 🙂
Another time, I ticked someone off real good. I said something (in response to an incident) that started a mini landslide. It was actually pretty stressful. I apologized. She did not. I think she engaged in some behaviors unbecoming, but are someone else’s bad manners my problem? NO. I can’t help how others think or behave.
In this world today, there is no way to live without eventually rubbing someone the wrong way or making a mistake. I am only human, I am imperfect, and so I cannot say and do absolutely the “right thing” each and every time. There is a balance I try and achieve and grace has a whole lot to do with it.
If I believe that I am here on this earth for a purpose, then everything that I do (and everything that happens to me) is a learning experience. I may fall down over and over again, but if I get back up, dust myself off, and keep going, I am a survivor. God’s love teaches me that no matter what, I am important and my contributions to those around me, are valued. I must believe that just about everything I do, is a reflection of God’s plan for me.
And though no one is fond of apologies I don’t mind apologizing, especially if I did something I I truly deserve to say I’m Sorry for. When you know you are truly loved by God, you believe yourself worthy and that makes mistakes ok. Giving heartfelt apologies is a gift, a sign of character. I honestly believe most of world’s psychiatric problems would go away, if we all would admit once in a while that we are not perfect.
How spectacular it is that every day unfolds before us, a clean slate, a white page that we can color and paint and sculpt any way we want. The best thing I can do for myself is go forward, trusting that I’ll do the best I can to make good choices and affect others in a positive way. That’s how grace works. It gives me the confidence to make decisions I can live with.