Ode to a Beloved Pet- Miss Jordan

It’s January. Christmas has come and gone, and the New Year has begun. It is almost the one year anniversary of the passing of my mom (January 10). Our beloved senior dog, Miss Jordan, passed on December 15th. The void in my life is palpable. Yet I feel a peace, a relief that I haven’t felt in a long time.

When you devote yourself as a caregiver, whether it be to a parent, child, animal, or other, it takes its toll. For parents who have a special needs child, I cannot imagine the lifelong commitment. I assisted my mother for a solid decade and it completely wore me out. Without my spouse and sisters, it would have been unimaginable.

And then there’s Miss Jordan. She was with us for sixteen years. Anyone who has cared for a senior dog will tell you that it’s no picnic. But yet, we care deeply out of love and do everything we can to make them comfortable.

I think she was barely a few months old when my daughter spotted Jordan, tail wagging and looking like she was ready for a new family. Michelene knocked on the door of her birth house, asked if Jordan was available for adoption, and brought her home that day (no charge, by the way).

We had a older border collie mix named Lucky who was not happy when Jordan came. Jordan playfully irritated Lucky to no end, and Lucky would respond with barking until he was hoarse. But Jordan motivated Lucky and I swear he lived a bit longer with her energy.

Jordan defied injury and death a couple of times. She had a habit of chasing deer through our neighboring woods and once I drove around to find her, narrowing catching her before she stepped onto a busy main road. She gave us numerous other causes for alarm, always coming out like a cat with nine lives.

We raised chickens for many years, and early in her puphood we heard cackling in the coop very late one night. Jim took Jordan down and opened the door, only to find a raccoon had infiltrated and was wreaking havoc. Jordan quickly snatched the raccoon behind the ears and in one fell crunch, the offending animal was silenced.

After that, Jordan became fiercely protective of the chickens. She sat outside with them in the evenings when they languished in the yard, feasting on bugs and sometimes, my flowers, roaming freely under her protection. Her reward was a fresh egg, which she gently cracked open, licked from inside out, and devoured completely.

Towards the end of her life, Jordan still walked our field several times a day, her steps a memory from when my grandson Gavin was young. As a child, he drove his Jeep Power Wheels around the parameters every morning and several times a day, Jordan following closely behind. Sticking her nose deeply into the grass, she would sniff out the deer and other varmints that had likely passed through during the night. Even at Jordan’s old age, she still attempted to chase anything that came into her yard because after all, it was HER yard.

Thank you Jordan for your years of devotion. For sharing your joy and patience and inspiring me to sit outside and revel in nature. You were an amazing welcoming committee for every house guest. We love you and will remember you eternally.

Jordan the Wonder Dog
Jordan with Sebastian and Molly (Michelene’s dogs)
My favorite picture of Jordan, captured summer of 2022
Jordan was ready to go anywhere, at any time!

Living In The Moment

(It’s the 11th year of my blog and I’m going to be sharing some of my earliest writings with you. Here’s one of the first I ever published.)

This is easier said than done isn’t it? With the holidays just around the corner, I can really start to feel overwhelmed by the excitement, preparation and….. the worry.

I am a very good worrier. I seem to have been bred for it as my mom and my grandmother were expert worriers. Even when things were going well, they still worried. What if something awful would happen? Let us imagine the worst case scenario and plan for it. Let’s imagine 20 plans of action to the unimaginable and then maybe perhaps we will be prepared.

Somehow one day, I felt my cloak of worry and noticed how heavy it had become. It is just not worth it, I decided, to keep that heavy coat on all the time. I began to peel it off. First, it fell a bit back from my shoulders. Then I took one arm completely out. (whew! even that felt better). Slowly, over time, I took the other arm out and THUD. The coat fell to the ground.

I realize now that I do have the ability to handle anything that life may challenge me with. I am up to the task. And I have people in my life that love me and are willing to stand by or assist should I need it. Why not take advantage of those things?

Living in the moment is how I deal with any attempts of my own to retreat back into my cloak of worry. Living in the moment frees up mental space and allows me to enjoy who I am spending time with and what I have chosen to do at this moment.

English: Trees in the snow
Enjoy the moment!

It’s nice to share. Thank you.

What I Can Be Grateful For Right Now

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I have to say, this quarantine is quite the challenge. I’ve been fairly sequestered since March 14 and as the days wear on, staying positive feels like a daily chore.

Since I have spent the last seven years caring for my mom, my life was relatively simple. I had pared back my schedule, no longer working full time, but in the process started a part time business that has been my salvation.

But for wedding coordinators and other event personnel these are trying times. I’m working on a few ideas but business has come to an almost screeching halt. My husband is working from home and honestly, I’m relieved to have him here. From a standpoint of family safety, and for the income it provides, there is much to be thankful for.

What is getting me through? Well, besides coffee and chocolate, it’s Gratitude. Yes, that meaningful little word has become a daily touchstone for me.

In expressing what I’m grateful for, I’ll tell you what I did this morning. I awoke at 6:15 am, started the coffee pot, and walked outside to fill my bird feeders. I wiped the rain drops from my outdoor bench. By the time I walked back in the house, the coffee was just about ready.

I took a cup, a pillow, and went back outside. As I sat on the bench with my warm cup of coffee, I relaxed and listened. The birds were a musical cornucopia. There was so much singing among them, joyous sounds of morning bliss, that I couldn’t help but feel grateful for their chorus.

Aaron Doucett

All day long, on and off, I check on my bird friends to see how they’re doing. I watch them intermingle with the squirrels. I wait for a new sparrow to choose my birdhouse for their next nest. The blackbirds position themselves on the rod where my feeders hang from, perching themselves to have access to the sunflower seeds. They all provide me with a daily reminder to be happy.

Along with the birds, I am in awe of what is blooming in my own backyard. This week I snipped branches of purple lilacs and made a vase full for both me and my mom. Their fragrance fills my kitchen. My peonies are budding, my roses are filled with fresh growth, and my azaleas are on the cusp. Every day I walk outside and look around, waiting for another flower to blossom.

I recently bought zinnias, dahlias, and a few herbs but here in Pennsylvania, it’s a bit too early to put them into the ground. So I have them in pots, outside during the day, and brought in for cooler overnight temperatures. I can wait. They are thriving and it won’t be long until it’s time to plant them in the ground.

One of my orchids has birthed six fresh blooms, with at least three more buds to go. To say they are beautiful is an understatement.

Not my orchids, but these are exactly what I have! Kelly Sikkema

If I just look around, I can find these simple reminders of beauty. This situation will not last forever. It takes a bit of emotional work to stay grounded. We have never had this type of global rest before and we may never have it again. Let’s cherish it.

What I Am Grateful For

Pine Trees Winter 2013
Pine Trees Winter 2013

Here it is- the first big snow of the season. Today is Thanksgiving in the USA and the Northeast is in the grips of some pretty cold weather. Thankfully, I am not traveling. I am the chef du jour, making most of the gratitude dinner with a little help from my friends.

My mom has been with me for a few days. I gave her a lecture a month or so ago about snow. If we are expecting any big accumulations I said, you have to come over. She didn’t argue with me when I told her Monday morning I was coming to pick her up.

So she and I have been spending some quality time together. I decided to put up my Christmas tree on Tuesday because I had a whole free day (and it snowed all day!) and those little lights just bring a lift to my heart. The nativity set went underneath right away. I have to keep in mind the reason for the season.

Region 1 DVD cover
Region 1 DVD cover (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

We indulged in a whole recliner session of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. It occurred to me how Rudolph was bullied- no playing with the others in reindeer games, all because of that red nose. I seriously shed a tear when the program was over and Santa said “Merry Christmas!” from his sky high sleigh.

So as I think about Thanksgiving, there are many things I have to be grateful for. I wanted to share my list with you and I’d love if you’d leave a comment and tell me what you’re most grateful for.

1. Family- Where would I be without them? My husband Jim, my kids Michelene and John, my grandson Gavin, Gavin’s dad Jonathan, my mom Katherine, sisters Mary and Cally and their beautiful partners Starr and Raymond. Jim’s family and both our extended families. My beautiful yellow lab Jordan. They are my greatest treasures.

2. Friends- Oh they have seen me through some troubling times. As has my family but my closest friends are privy to my thoughts, words and deeds of high and low. I owe my salvation to my recovery friends and their infinite wisdom on life and teachings on practicing these principles in all my affairs.

3. Faith- Deep as the ocean, infinite as the sky, my love for God only grows and grows each day. I realize how walking a spiritual path has changed everything. It makes me understand that I am not in control and God is.

I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving! If you are alone, give me or a close friend of yours a call. We should all be together on Thanksgiving.

I wish you a happy Thanksgiving of great blessings! Tell me, what are you grateful for?

Living Generously

Mom and her delicious Finikia!
Mom and her delicious Finikia!

“Give , and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.” Luke 6:38

I would have to say that my mother has set the best example for me of living generously.

She does not have all that much but what she has she will share with you unselfishly. Preferring not to spend money on herself, she will lavishly offer to spring for lunch or try to give me money when I buy her something that is really a gift.

Case in point, my sister Mary is coming to town in a couple of weeks and my mom already has the itinerary pretty much finished (this is why I am an event planner!). One day’s activities involves going to our church’s mini food festival and mom has already told me she is paying for dinners- lamb, pastichio, stuffed grape leaves, etc.

Over my objections (it does no good) she has told me she will take care of the food bill that night.

I used to think my mom financially cut herself a bit too close at times but as I get older, and closer to God, I think honestly she has the right idea. Everything she needs has been provided to her. She is well taken care of and in good health now (thank you!). Happy to be with her simple things, she is content to have just enough.

I firmly believe the old wives saying of “you can’t take it with you”. I love how wealthy people are giving their money away in clever and creative ways, not leaving it all for their children but making them earn it themselves.

I found this link recently to an article about wealthy people who have decided not to leave their fortunes to their kids. Warren Buffet for instance has pledged to give away 99% of his wealth either during his life or before he dies. He has already pledged 83% of it to the Gates Foundation.

What about simple folk like me? I am still finding creative ways to be generous, despite my limited income these days. Giving of my time (without expecting payment) to good causes is my favorite generous act of late. I also like to treat to things that are only a few dollars- coffee or dessert for a friend, a nice book from the used book store. I love these forms of generosity; they keep my feet firmly planted where they need to be, in service to others.

If I am tempted to be selfish with my time or money, I remind myself how generosity will come back to me multiplied.

Blessings to you today! What is your favorite act of generosity?

Pondering Some Sweet Things

One of my new friends! Sweet Bites Cookies
One of my new friends! Sweet Bites Cookies

I’ve met some interesting people in the last couple of weeks as I venture out and promote my wedding and event business.

There was the group of local women business owners who invited me to a networking event last week. Included in the bunch was a lovely woman who brought her magic cookies and shared them with all of us. I was so impressed with Diane that I’m adding her to my business website! (Click on the link under the cookie picture to check her out)

I also went to see a local farm- Destiny Hill– that does weddings on their real working lavender farm. And they design bridal flowers pulled from their own flower beds! I was in love with the place from the moment I drove up the driveway!

There was something interesting too that happened to me last week that I’ve been wanting to share with you. Here goes….

Can you see them?
Can you see them?

I was driving on a road just minutes away from my own home, engrossed in thinking about my business. (I’ve been doing that a lot lately!) So catching myself, I took a minute for a gratitude prayer and then asked God for assistance with my new venture. In the next minute, the car in front of me slowed down. I glanced up to see what was going on and there was the source. A gaggle of small turkeys, slowly making their way across the road, completely stopping traffic. As they reached the other side, the lead turkey decided she really didn’t want that side, she wanted the other side.

So they all turned around and went back across the road.

I pulled my car over to the berm, so excited about the turkeys that I grabbed my cell phone. Not wanting to scare them, I kept back and was able to snap a picture or two. Other cars sped on as soon as the turkeys were off the road. I stood a moment or two until they disappeared into the brush.

What does this beautiful nature sighting mean? To me it was an instant affirmation that God is with me. S(he) is watching over me and hears my prayers. All I need to do is believe and things will work out as they should, not by my plan but by a divine plan. To see my favorite creatures in such multiples, I can’t help but be overwhelmed by the sight. To me, it is a sign of future abundance as long as I am willing to keep a grateful heart.

What’s your favorite creature of nature? I’d love to know!

What Speaks of Love?

The Bonfire

“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” ― Mother Teresa

I was loading socks into Jim’s dresser drawer when I remembered a moment in time. It was a flashback to a conversation between Jim and our close friend John.

Jim had asked John what act of his wife’s spoke of love? John thought for a moment and said “The smell of dinner when I drive up my driveway! That spells LOVE to me!”, said John in his big, beautiful voice. I braced myself for what Jim would say. “A drawer full of socks, John. I love when I open my drawer and see it full of socks.”

Since then I have remembered what filling up that sock drawer means to Jim. It speaks of my love for him. It took me only a moment (and thirty years of marriage) to realize how much he appreciated it.

What does Jim do for me that I love? He builds great campfires. He sets up the logs in a nice, stacked fashion, utilizes newspaper strategically, and sometimes even gets creative with a few charcoal briquets just to get things going.

I once told Jim that his fires “flickered in all the right places.” He loved that and says it’s one of the nicest things I have ever said to him.

When I think about it, it’s really those little things that sometimes mean the most. I try and pay attention to what I do for the special people in my life- my kids, my mom, my grandson, my family, my friends. Thoughtful and kind acts are not necessarily about great or expensive gifts. Meaningful acts of loving kindness can be simple and sweet, inexpensive and lovely.

I like to take my mother a mason jar of flowers from my yard when I visit her. Or, I take her something special from the farmer’s market- those little zucchini, an eggplant or some fresh green beans. I know how much she likes those kinds of things.

This weekend, I hope someone does something special for you and vice versa. Have a great holiday!

Does someone you know do something especially kind for you? Or do you have a great memory of a parent or loved one from your past? Here’s your chance to share it with us and give us some good ideas!

An Attitude of Gratitude

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If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough. Meister Eckhart

I went to a wedding not so long ago and when the thank you note for the gift arrived, it was a picture of the bride and groom holding a sign that said “thank you.” It was nice but there was no personalization, no signature, just the picture. My heart sank a bit as I thought this was yet another symptom of our too busy lives. Were thank you notes becoming a thing of the past?

So it gave my heart a lift when my husband shared this story with me recently. He said, “There are days when it is terrible to be a nurse in the ER. We see some of the same people over and over again, who do nothing different for their own conditions, and yet they expect us to fix it immediately. I get tired and worn out and wonder for what purpose I am here.”

On one particular day Jim headed back to his station and there was a clasp envelope laying on his desk. When he opened it, there were three thank you notes inside. They were from the children of a woman he worked with; they had all come to Jim’s Honey Party and had participated in spinning the combs and witnessing the delicious, sticky honey that had come from that experience.

The notes expressed gratitude and warmed my husband’s heart. He told me, “It was a great moment to realize that I had made a difference in someone’s life.” I am guessing those little notes restored Jim’s faith in himself and the reason he is here on earth.

I have several boxes of pretty thank you cards and I try and remember to thank people who have given me a gift. But I also try and send a thank you for no reason other than to acknowledge someone else’s loving act of kindness. Recently, my aunt and uncle took me to Chicago for a wedding. They came to my doorstep and picked me up. We spent the entire, wonderful weekend together. Afterwards I wrote them a thank you note because not only did I have an amazing time, but I got to know their teen grandchildren a whole lot better and realized what totally beautiful kids they are.

A few years ago when I was beginning my spiritual journey, I decided to keep a gratitude journal. I wrote a few things down each night I was grateful for. It could be something that happened that day, or a quality I had come to recognize in myself or others. After pages and pages of gratitude, a shift in my thinking occurred. I realized the gift of every day life.

I save most all of the thank you notes I receive. There is a shoe box in my closet where I have amassed a collection of notes I’ve received over the years. There are hallmark cards, handwritten notes, some large and some small, but that box serves a purpose. Whenever I am feeling down, I reach for it. I pull out the cards and read them one by one. By the time I am done, my faith in myself is restored.

*The thank you note on the window sill says, “Thank you for giving my shoes back. I liked playing with Jake. A bee is flying.” (sweet!)

Have you ever received a thank you note that you just never forgot? Tell me about it!

A Letter to Dad

Dear Dad,

I can’t believe it has been 16 years since your passing. It was Father’s Day 1997 when Mom called to relay the news that you breathed your last breath. Uncle Jim G. was so mad because he had to leave his vacation in Yellowstone Park! Ha! But I knew the aunts and uncles would never miss your funeral. Vacation or not, they would be there….

I was not upset that you passed on Father’s Day. It actually caused me to smile because I could imagine you saying from heaven, “NOW you’ll never forget me!”. But truly Dad it would be impossible to do so.

Dad and I
Dad and I

Because you, like me, were an oldest child and it was you who stepped up, was responsible and felt the pressure. You made your presence known in a big way and I learned from your example to be a person who honors their word.

Jim and I mentioned the auto auction the other day, the one you used to take me to occasionally. For a few brief moments I could smell the sauerkraut on the hotdogs that you would buy us in the cafeteria. Mom would NEVER make anything like that at home but you introduced me to sauerkraut and I have loved it ever since!

I am grateful that you and I got to work together at the car dealership for those few precious years. You trusted me enough to leave me in charge when you and mom went away on vacations. That meant much to me and taught me great leadership skills.

Someone I was with last night mentioned Kennywood Park and I was again taken back to the times when you and mom would accompany Jim and I and the kids for a day at the amusement park. You and mom would walk around, eat all the great carnival food with us (their cotton candy was fabulous!) and watch the kids ride the roller coasters. I didn’t know then but I do know now what precious times those were.

I am trying to pay attention to those things I do lately which at first glance may seem insignificant, but could become life long good memories for Michelene, John and Gavin. The day will come when they will remember this and that about me and I want those moments to be fond remembrances, like the ones I have of you.

I am more and more aware of how short life really is. I try to remember how precious each day is and to have gratitude for all my blessings.

Happy Father’s Day Dad!!

One of my favorite pictures!
One of my favorite pictures!

The Divine Mr. Kibosh

“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
― Dr. Seuss


Almost twenty years ago, I began a speciality coffee business. This was when gourmet coffee was just on the cusp of becoming something really big.

From Google.com
Delicious Coffee! Via Pinterest

My little coffeehouse was called “Cappuccino City.” It quickly established itself as the hip place to be and I thoroughly enjoyed being a small business owner. I made friends during that time that I still have to this day.

One of my customers was a stand out. His name was Joe. My nickname is Jo. Catch the catch? He’d come in and say “Hi Jo!” and I’d say “Hi Joe!”. We’d chat a few minutes and then he’d be on his way.

Years later, after I sold the coffee house, I needed some financial work done and I saw his ad in a local publication. I called him and said “Joe, do you remember me?” He said, “Of course!” Turns out his business was right down the road from my house.

So we became business acquaintances, but more. Joe was my cheerleader, always encouraging me to ask for more money (!) from my jobs and making me feel so good about myself that I’d leave his office practically on Cloud Nine.

Soon, after years of driving the parkway into Pittsburgh, I grew weary. I was looking for opportunities close to home. I had my eye on Joe, just in case he would need me.

I let him know it at one of my visits. Just an “if you ever need someone, please keep me in mind” pitch. And then one day, when it seemed I couldn’t take another traffic jam, I happened to call him about something. He said his long time admin had left. I asked him if I could interview for the job.

He said to come down and meet with his lead person. She and I went to lunch and the rest is history.

So it was with a heavy heart that I left Joe last month, after barely hitting my two year mark. As you may remember, I needed to spend more time with Mom. But I consider every minute I spent with  Joe worth it. Here are some great bits of wisdom I learned from him:

1. You develop confidence when you figure things out for yourself.

2. Pizza with pepperoni that is baked a little longer tastes really good.

3. When someone puts a stop to something, it’s called a “kibosh”.

4. There is no substitute for personal attention to a client.

5. Don’t get something new until the old one breaks. 🙂

I like to think I taught Joe a few things myself. He loved the Greek word “Fuss-a-ria” which means to cause a big fuss. Once Joe learned this word, it became a part of his dictionary. (and I love the word “Kibosh!”) He loved other things Greek too. I took him to my church during our food festival and introduced him to some great Greek food. Hopefully, I taught him some other wisdom filled lessons; some he needed and some he probably didn’t want – like a crash course on menopausal women! In return, he believed in me and my capabilities. He had confidence in me when sometimes I did not have it myself.

I believe in my heart that even though my time with Joe was short, it had a divine purpose. I learned many new things that could be of great benefit someday. Sometimes even the shortest experiences have the longest impressions.

Have you ever met someone you feel had a divine purpose in your life?

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