Confessions of an Anticipater

You Are Enough, from the upcoming Kindness Rocks Garden, Clinton, PA.

I grew up with years of conditioning to be an anticipater. My mother was the queen of hospitality and loved to bake and cook. She kept an immaculate home. When she and my dad entertained, there was always too much food but it was so good that none of us ever minded the leftovers.

When we invite friends or family over, we anticipate how many people, how much food, what will guests need or want to drink. This anticipating serves us well and in my work as a wedding planner, it serves me even better. I am constantly looking ahead to what’s next when it comes to weddings and the big day. Whatever the bride, groom, their respective families, and the guests need, both Sara and I will deliver on.

These same characteristics that serve me so well in my line of work do not always serve me in normal living. As a person who is committed to “letting go” of trivial matters and over planning, it is a challenge to wrestle my elite planning skills with my desire to live a simpler life.

Spontaneity is not one of my greatest characteristics. Yet I do try and be so, especially when I have no desire to cook for myself. I search for a friend who might be available for breakfast,  lunch, or just shopping. It used to be that I had to plan these things ahead of time. Well, no more.

I have several friends that I can reach out to who will likely meet me on the spur of the moment. If I can’t find one available, I simply take a book and go myself. No planning necessary there.

If I want to live life as a spiritual journey, I have to be open to whatever is sent my way. Control is best given up. Life is so much easier when it is allowed to unfold any way it wants. Sometimes the best things happen when we least expect them to.

I have a friend who likes to say, “God has a plan for us but we are not on the planning committee.” So true. Divine love is best experienced without boundaries or borders.

Join me on my graceful journey.

6 Replies to “Confessions of an Anticipater”

  1. Another great post! Thank you for sharing! I can be a little spontaneous, but with 4 kids to coordinate, it is sometimes a bit difficult! My spiritual journey has taken a detour and I have to be ok with that! I am happy you found your latest path…because we know it will just lead to the next one!

  2. I imagine that ability to predict and anticipate serves you very well in your career. It’s not often that someone puts a skill to such good use. I can relate to how there is always a down side to our strengths and that struggle to find balance and peace. I don’t know what’s so scary about sitting at a table for one, but I feel it too. It feels indulgent in the best possible way to enjoy a meal out and a good book at the same time.

  3. Good morning, Joanne! 🌞I can surely relate to living life as an anticipator! That word caught my eye as I never really identified or defined my anticipating with a word! It was just the way I grew up ( as did you) and was something I was conditioned to do. When we have gatherings or family functions at our house, I start anticipating & planning so far in advance that my husband will tease me saying….”so are you going to start preparing for Christmas dinner now that it’s October?” 😄 However, being an anticipator certainly serves you well, as you are an excellent wedding planner with a wonderful reputation! As much as I like to plan, I am very spontaneous when it comes to going to lunch or dinner myself. That is something I don’t even think twice about. Haha I love reading your posts on Sunday morning . Always seems to inspire the week ahead!

    1. Thank you Cindy! I can so relate to planning Christmas in October! My mom is always very excited about the holidays and will begin to anticipate them way in advance. That is probably where I acquired my gift of event planning!
      I love that you are spontaneous about other things such as going to lunch or dinner. That is a wonderful way to be. God bless. xo

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